Ambitions for growing corn
Bird in the woodstove
Clothes hanging on the long clothesline
Daddy's coming home song that began with "Where is Daddy?"
Eating our meals outside on the picnic table
Forts in the trees
Goat under the front stoop
Hot air balloon landed in our farm field
Ice rink formed by pooled water that froze
Jars of homemade jam, pickles and preserves
Kittens born to our cat Ginger
Long driveway that needed to be plowed often on account of snow drifts as well as snowfalls
Mouse in the kitchen
No water one winter
One hundred acre farm - the fields were rented to a local farmer
Plastic swimming pool for the children
Quiet much of the time
Rural route mailing address
Swing set with an attached slide
Toby, our golden retriever
Using our zucchini harvest in many different ways
Vegetable garden
Woodstove to keep us warm in the winter
X can stand for Christ - Catholic procession up our rural road from one church to another
Young children who were born while we lived on the farm
Zucchinis so big that they were shared
Monday, 8 July 2013
Tuesday, 28 May 2013
No Other Like Our God...
who can fully satisfy -
"You open your hand and satisfy the desires of every living thing." Psalm 145:16 (NIV)
who can rescue us-
"...the Lord knows how to rescue godly people from their trials..." 2 Peter 2:9 (NLT)who can calm our fears-
"I prayed to the Lord, and he answered me, freeing me from all my fears. Psalm 34:4 (NLT)
who can help-
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10 (NIV)
who can deliver-
"He will call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him." Psalm 91:10 (NIV)
who can know and understand-
"As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust." Psalm 103: 13,14 (NIV)
who can restore- "And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast." 1Peter 5:10 (NIV)
who can keep-
"To him who is able to keep you from falling and to present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy- to the only God our Savior be glory, majesty, power and authority through Jesus Christ our Lord, before all ages, now and forevermore! Amen." Jude 1:24 (NIV)
who can direct-
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will direct your paths." (NLT)
who can counsel-
" You keep on guiding me with your counsel, leading me to a glorious destiny." Psalm 73:24 (NLT)
Monday, 27 May 2013
A Time Apart
I want to continue sharing with you how God recently led me to a time apart for personal study and reflection. These insights and reflections are from my journaling and will be shared in present tense to convey more accurately my thought processes and the promptings of the Holy Spirit.
March 14 2013- "I sense that the reason God does not want me to take part in the next Bible study series is because I need to hear from God what He wants to say to me. I really sense that I am in a gathering, learning and exploring time. I do not know where it will end or what it will look like. God knows what I will do with what I learn; that is for Him to decide. Right now I need to be obedient to His leading for my life. I have to be obedient so He can trust me with the things He will show me and teach me."
March 15 2013 - "I see now that I am in a preparation time for the next phase of my life as an empty nester. I was thinking short-term, but I think that God has some long-term goals in mind for what He wants to do in my life and then how He wants to use me... God leads me on the path of His choosing. I may not want to go there at first because I cannot see where it will lead, but I know Who is leading me. I know God's heart is for me."
March 21 2013 "I was just thinking about spending time with the Lord and I sensed Him saying He wants to spend time with me."
March 25 2013 (I wrote an email to the other Bible study leaders explaining why I was not going to take part and how God was leading me to a time apart) "When I was writing the email my eyes filled with tears and my heart was overwhelmed by the goodness of God in how He is leading me. I could not make this up. I have just experienced first-hand how God orchestrates and leads and guides - even through human vessels. I know that there are changes coming - not just changes for a season, but changes for a lifetime. God is the one who does the transforming. I just have to step out in faith and obedience."
March 14 2013- "I sense that the reason God does not want me to take part in the next Bible study series is because I need to hear from God what He wants to say to me. I really sense that I am in a gathering, learning and exploring time. I do not know where it will end or what it will look like. God knows what I will do with what I learn; that is for Him to decide. Right now I need to be obedient to His leading for my life. I have to be obedient so He can trust me with the things He will show me and teach me."
March 15 2013 - "I see now that I am in a preparation time for the next phase of my life as an empty nester. I was thinking short-term, but I think that God has some long-term goals in mind for what He wants to do in my life and then how He wants to use me... God leads me on the path of His choosing. I may not want to go there at first because I cannot see where it will lead, but I know Who is leading me. I know God's heart is for me."
March 21 2013 "I was just thinking about spending time with the Lord and I sensed Him saying He wants to spend time with me."
March 25 2013 (I wrote an email to the other Bible study leaders explaining why I was not going to take part and how God was leading me to a time apart) "When I was writing the email my eyes filled with tears and my heart was overwhelmed by the goodness of God in how He is leading me. I could not make this up. I have just experienced first-hand how God orchestrates and leads and guides - even through human vessels. I know that there are changes coming - not just changes for a season, but changes for a lifetime. God is the one who does the transforming. I just have to step out in faith and obedience."
Monday, 15 April 2013
How God is Leading Me
It is only just recently that I am aware of how the many books, devotions, services and scriptures are all dove-tailing and showing me God's leading. I will share with you some of the various pieces:
I do a daily devotional reading, Every Day With Jesus by Selwyn Hughes. My parents subscribe to it and then pass on their old copies to me. Each devotional covers a 2 month period and I have several back copies. How I usually choose one is often based on the day of the week the previous one I was doing finishes. The current one I chose was on spiritual disciplines. In one of the lessons it covered fasting and suggested reading a book on fasting. Immediately God brought to mind a book, God's Chosen Fast by Arthur Wallis, that I had not yet read or studied. (This is something I am now reading and studying.)
My husband and I attended the Lenten series services sponsored by the Bradford Ministerial. I recently attended a funeral service at Holland Marsh CRC and the first day of their catechism was recited. These services had liturgy that spoke to my spirit and awakened a desire to be more contemplative. I know that God is awakening something in me. I sense that I am to have a more disciplined time of seeking the Lord. I was reminded of a book I had read and I could picture it in my mind. I knew God was directing me to it - Sacred Rhythms: Arranging Our Lives For Spiritual Transformation. I have also been going through a devotional book, Contemplating The Cross: A Pilgrimage of Prayer. This is helping me to slow down and think about all that Jesus went through. (I just finished reading this book yesterday.)
My mother and I attended the World Day of Prayer service at Holy Martyrs of Japan, which was sponsored by various churches in town. The Deacon gave a message on "You Did It For Me". He spoke about seeing Jesus in the people we help/serve. He spoke on the importance of Fasting, Prayer and Alms. He said that our alms or works will not be different from the United Way unless we pray before we give alms or do service, so that we see Jesus and we do it for Him. He said that our prayers will not have depth without fasting. He said that we cannot pick and choose, but rather all three disciplines are important. He said that fasting was more than abstaining from food it was also about denying ourselves. It was a good message for me to hear in light of my involvement with the clothing room of a local ministry.
I know that this is a time of preparation for the new season of life God has for me.
I do a daily devotional reading, Every Day With Jesus by Selwyn Hughes. My parents subscribe to it and then pass on their old copies to me. Each devotional covers a 2 month period and I have several back copies. How I usually choose one is often based on the day of the week the previous one I was doing finishes. The current one I chose was on spiritual disciplines. In one of the lessons it covered fasting and suggested reading a book on fasting. Immediately God brought to mind a book, God's Chosen Fast by Arthur Wallis, that I had not yet read or studied. (This is something I am now reading and studying.)
My husband and I attended the Lenten series services sponsored by the Bradford Ministerial. I recently attended a funeral service at Holland Marsh CRC and the first day of their catechism was recited. These services had liturgy that spoke to my spirit and awakened a desire to be more contemplative. I know that God is awakening something in me. I sense that I am to have a more disciplined time of seeking the Lord. I was reminded of a book I had read and I could picture it in my mind. I knew God was directing me to it - Sacred Rhythms: Arranging Our Lives For Spiritual Transformation. I have also been going through a devotional book, Contemplating The Cross: A Pilgrimage of Prayer. This is helping me to slow down and think about all that Jesus went through. (I just finished reading this book yesterday.)
My mother and I attended the World Day of Prayer service at Holy Martyrs of Japan, which was sponsored by various churches in town. The Deacon gave a message on "You Did It For Me". He spoke about seeing Jesus in the people we help/serve. He spoke on the importance of Fasting, Prayer and Alms. He said that our alms or works will not be different from the United Way unless we pray before we give alms or do service, so that we see Jesus and we do it for Him. He said that our prayers will not have depth without fasting. He said that we cannot pick and choose, but rather all three disciplines are important. He said that fasting was more than abstaining from food it was also about denying ourselves. It was a good message for me to hear in light of my involvement with the clothing room of a local ministry.
I know that this is a time of preparation for the new season of life God has for me.
Wednesday, 13 February 2013
A Grandmother's Love
When I think about “love”, my mind is immediately drawn to my paternal grandmother Reva Tomlinson.
I am the eldest of three girls, but not the eldest granddaughter on my father’s side of the family. Grandma Tomlinson always wanted to have a daughter but she only had two sons, my father being her youngest. I had a special place in my grandmother’s heart and she in mine. I enjoyed spending time with her even into my teenage years.
My high school, Lawrence Park Collegiate Institute, was located near the street my grandparents lived on. There were times when I would walk along Brookdale Avenue, toward their home and the burdens of the day would slip away. Grandma would welcome me in and of course I would be offered some milk and cookies. Grandma loved to bake and she would have at least three tins of different cookies. She stored her cookie tins in the back porch, which was unheated. Sometimes I would be invited to stay for supper and then later my grandfather would drive me home.
One time I stayed at their home for two weeks while my parents went abroad since it was close to my high school. My younger sisters stayed at our home and were cared for by my maternal grandparents as they needed to be close to their elementary school. I even went to my uncle’s cottage with Grandma and Grandpa Tomlinson for a couple of days. I loved spending time with them and hearing their stories. Although, to my chagrin, I did complain to my dad on occasion that I had heard those stories repeated too many times. At the time I thought I would always remember every detail since I heard them so often. I wish that I had taken the time to record those stories in some form other than trying to rely solely on my memory.
I remember one time as a young preteen wanting to make Grandma beautiful for when Grandpa came home from work. For special occasions or when she was going out Reva wore rouge and face powder, which she allowed me to use on her. I also chose some clip-on earrings for her to wear with a matching necklace and even a broach. I can remember Grandpa playing along and commenting on how beautiful she looked, even if she was a tad overdressed!
Grandma loved to sew and when I was younger she sewed me and my dolls matching outfits. Reva made all her own clothes including her matching hats as she had once worked as a milliner. I loved to watch her sew and when I was old enough I asked her to teach me to sew. My mother had the same sewing machine and I was not allowed to touch it, but my grandmother took the time to teach me one-on-one. I also took sewing at school in junior high and later at summer school. I remember going to a fabric store with my grandparents to pick out some special polyester blend that I could use to make some outfits. That was in the seventies so that type of fabric was all the rage!
Grandma made each of the six grandchildren a traditional quilt and a yo-yo quilt. I remember one time my grandmother gave me some rather explicit advice to not let my husband love me on top of the yo-yo quilt as it would crush it. Grandma had a healthy view of the conjugal relationship and on occasion she did slip in some comments. She just said this so nonchalantly but as usual I was quite embarrassed.
My grandparents sold their home on Brookdale Avenue and moved to an apartment in Scarborough. We also moved from Willowdale to Downsview and I changed high schools for my final two years. If I wanted to visit my grandparents now I needed to take the TTC or get a drive with my parents. My grandfather passed away and Grandma stayed on in the apartment until she could no longer cook for herself. Reva was moved into the nursing home part of the complex, Shepherd Manor, where she could eat in a dining room with other seniors. Her move and further downsizing coincided with my family’s recent move to a bigger house and my upcoming marriage.
Grandma gave me her sewing machine and some money as a wedding gift. She had instructed me to trade in the sewing machine and add the money in order to purchase a newer fancier sewing machine. I could not bring myself to do it. I thought about all the clothes and other articles she had sewn with this machine and that if she was able to do all that with this machine then I would use it too. One time when I brought the machine in for service the serviceman said that it is a great machine and will keep working well as long as I maintain it. I have sewn many clothes for myself and my family as well as other items. I have used some of the attachments such as the buttonholer and the zipper foot but there are some fancier ones that I have yet to use.
The final item my grandmother gave me was her engagement ring. I didn’t receive it until after she had passed away. Grandma had noticed that I did not have an engagement ring and she told me that when she died she wanted me to have it. I had the ring resized as it was too big and now I wear that ring only on special occasions as I want to preserve it.
One day I thought about some of the items I have from Grandma Tomlinson and I was overwhelmed by the love that each item represented. Grandma passed on the love of a spouse; the love of family; the love of cooking and baking; the love of sewing; and the love of God. Grandma prayed for our family to come to know Jesus as our Lord and Saviour and she rejoiced when we did come to faith. I know that one day I will see her again and what a day of rejoicing that will be!
I am the eldest of three girls, but not the eldest granddaughter on my father’s side of the family. Grandma Tomlinson always wanted to have a daughter but she only had two sons, my father being her youngest. I had a special place in my grandmother’s heart and she in mine. I enjoyed spending time with her even into my teenage years.
My high school, Lawrence Park Collegiate Institute, was located near the street my grandparents lived on. There were times when I would walk along Brookdale Avenue, toward their home and the burdens of the day would slip away. Grandma would welcome me in and of course I would be offered some milk and cookies. Grandma loved to bake and she would have at least three tins of different cookies. She stored her cookie tins in the back porch, which was unheated. Sometimes I would be invited to stay for supper and then later my grandfather would drive me home.
One time I stayed at their home for two weeks while my parents went abroad since it was close to my high school. My younger sisters stayed at our home and were cared for by my maternal grandparents as they needed to be close to their elementary school. I even went to my uncle’s cottage with Grandma and Grandpa Tomlinson for a couple of days. I loved spending time with them and hearing their stories. Although, to my chagrin, I did complain to my dad on occasion that I had heard those stories repeated too many times. At the time I thought I would always remember every detail since I heard them so often. I wish that I had taken the time to record those stories in some form other than trying to rely solely on my memory.
I remember one time as a young preteen wanting to make Grandma beautiful for when Grandpa came home from work. For special occasions or when she was going out Reva wore rouge and face powder, which she allowed me to use on her. I also chose some clip-on earrings for her to wear with a matching necklace and even a broach. I can remember Grandpa playing along and commenting on how beautiful she looked, even if she was a tad overdressed!
Grandma loved to sew and when I was younger she sewed me and my dolls matching outfits. Reva made all her own clothes including her matching hats as she had once worked as a milliner. I loved to watch her sew and when I was old enough I asked her to teach me to sew. My mother had the same sewing machine and I was not allowed to touch it, but my grandmother took the time to teach me one-on-one. I also took sewing at school in junior high and later at summer school. I remember going to a fabric store with my grandparents to pick out some special polyester blend that I could use to make some outfits. That was in the seventies so that type of fabric was all the rage!
Grandma made each of the six grandchildren a traditional quilt and a yo-yo quilt. I remember one time my grandmother gave me some rather explicit advice to not let my husband love me on top of the yo-yo quilt as it would crush it. Grandma had a healthy view of the conjugal relationship and on occasion she did slip in some comments. She just said this so nonchalantly but as usual I was quite embarrassed.
My grandparents sold their home on Brookdale Avenue and moved to an apartment in Scarborough. We also moved from Willowdale to Downsview and I changed high schools for my final two years. If I wanted to visit my grandparents now I needed to take the TTC or get a drive with my parents. My grandfather passed away and Grandma stayed on in the apartment until she could no longer cook for herself. Reva was moved into the nursing home part of the complex, Shepherd Manor, where she could eat in a dining room with other seniors. Her move and further downsizing coincided with my family’s recent move to a bigger house and my upcoming marriage.
Grandma gave me her sewing machine and some money as a wedding gift. She had instructed me to trade in the sewing machine and add the money in order to purchase a newer fancier sewing machine. I could not bring myself to do it. I thought about all the clothes and other articles she had sewn with this machine and that if she was able to do all that with this machine then I would use it too. One time when I brought the machine in for service the serviceman said that it is a great machine and will keep working well as long as I maintain it. I have sewn many clothes for myself and my family as well as other items. I have used some of the attachments such as the buttonholer and the zipper foot but there are some fancier ones that I have yet to use.
The final item my grandmother gave me was her engagement ring. I didn’t receive it until after she had passed away. Grandma had noticed that I did not have an engagement ring and she told me that when she died she wanted me to have it. I had the ring resized as it was too big and now I wear that ring only on special occasions as I want to preserve it.
One day I thought about some of the items I have from Grandma Tomlinson and I was overwhelmed by the love that each item represented. Grandma passed on the love of a spouse; the love of family; the love of cooking and baking; the love of sewing; and the love of God. Grandma prayed for our family to come to know Jesus as our Lord and Saviour and she rejoiced when we did come to faith. I know that one day I will see her again and what a day of rejoicing that will be!
Wednesday, 14 November 2012
He Doesn't Live Here Anymore
I filled the kettle with water for the morning and then I
remembered
He doesn’t live here anymore
As I was making up the orange juice I realized it was lasting longer
He doesn’t live here anymore
I don’t need to refill the honey jar as often
He doesn’t live here anymore
When I was at Costco I realized I don’t need to buy three packages of English muffins
He doesn’t live here anymore
I stripped his bed; washed the sheets & duvet cover and stored them in the linen closet
He doesn’t live here anymore
I washed his remaining clothes and I packed them in bags
He doesn’t live here anymore
I packed up odds and ends in boxes that he had left behind
He doesn’t live here anymore
When I was hanging up the bath towels I remembered I didn’t need one for him
He doesn’t live here anymore
I don’t need to ask him if he’ll be home for supper
He doesn’t live here anymore
All of the cars now fit in the driveway
He doesn’t live here anymore
I was the last person up so I shut off the living room light before I went to bed
He doesn’t live here anymore
He doesn’t live here anymore
As I was making up the orange juice I realized it was lasting longer
He doesn’t live here anymore
I don’t need to refill the honey jar as often
He doesn’t live here anymore
When I was at Costco I realized I don’t need to buy three packages of English muffins
He doesn’t live here anymore
I stripped his bed; washed the sheets & duvet cover and stored them in the linen closet
He doesn’t live here anymore
I washed his remaining clothes and I packed them in bags
He doesn’t live here anymore
I packed up odds and ends in boxes that he had left behind
He doesn’t live here anymore
When I was hanging up the bath towels I remembered I didn’t need one for him
He doesn’t live here anymore
I don’t need to ask him if he’ll be home for supper
He doesn’t live here anymore
All of the cars now fit in the driveway
He doesn’t live here anymore
I was the last person up so I shut off the living room light before I went to bed
He doesn’t live here anymore
( These were the things I noticed in the first couple of weeks after our eldest son, Chris, was married. The phrase "He doesn't live here anymore" came to mind and I started writing down the changes I noticed.)
Wednesday, 13 June 2012
Learning To Sift
I am learning to sift out the things that God wants me to do from the things that I could do. It is funny how I have things I can do, yet I still long for the “big thing”. I know that life is made up of many little things. My first priority is to my family and my home, then to others. Of course God is first, but I am to serve God first by serving my family and then others. I am not to feel pressured to do everything that comes along.
In thinking about the pressure I feel about taking part in certain things, I see the root of the compulsion that drives me or condemns me is part of the past legalism and wanting to be well-thought-of and not ill-thought-of. Sometimes others have great expectations of us to do for them beyond what we are comfortable with or are capable. I need to give the burdens of others to God and not take any ownership of always having to do something. As I was praying about what God wanted me to do I sensed God saying “My sheep hear my voice and follow Me.” I need to follow what God wants me to do.
As I was lying in bed I had the thought “I want to do great things for God”. God then said to “remove ‘for God’ and what do you have? “ “I want to do great things”. I sensed God saying that often we have great aspirations, or aspiration to greatness, and we try to couch it in religious terms. It is almost as if we think that we are honoring God. We can honour God through little things that go unseen by others.
These thoughts and impressions have come from my journaling over this past year. As I have read through my journal, I have noticed the many times God used me in various ways. I do not need a title or an official ministry to be able to minister to others. God is the One who has ordained me and called me to serve Him. He will provide opportunities for me to serve. I can take encouragement from the fact that I am prepared and ready to serve. I am not using my gifts on an ongoing basis, but rather sporadically as the opportunities unfold. I know that God is in control. He is the One who made me; He is the One who gave me talents and abilities. It is at His discretion that He has given me certain spiritual gifts. God knows that I desire to be used.
During an evening of worship I had a picture in my mind of a giant hand at my side. I had thought that God had been preventing me from going somewhere or doing something, but through this picture I saw that God wanted to direct me where to go. His hand was protecting me and directing me. It was not as a hand in the stop position. I then realized that God did have a plan and I was walking in His plan. The desires I have deep inside are the fuel that gives me the desire or motivation to do what God has called me to do. I cannot make anything happen; I need to rely solely on God. Later, God impressed on my heart and spirit that He can and will direct if the “call” needs to come from someone rather than me volunteering on my own. My obedience to God’s call is either proactive by stepping out and volunteering to do something; or submissive by responding to requests to do something. I don’t need to be burdened by a desire to do something big for God; or be involved in some great purpose. God’s purpose for my life will be fulfilled and is being fulfilled.
In thinking about the pressure I feel about taking part in certain things, I see the root of the compulsion that drives me or condemns me is part of the past legalism and wanting to be well-thought-of and not ill-thought-of. Sometimes others have great expectations of us to do for them beyond what we are comfortable with or are capable. I need to give the burdens of others to God and not take any ownership of always having to do something. As I was praying about what God wanted me to do I sensed God saying “My sheep hear my voice and follow Me.” I need to follow what God wants me to do.
As I was lying in bed I had the thought “I want to do great things for God”. God then said to “remove ‘for God’ and what do you have? “ “I want to do great things”. I sensed God saying that often we have great aspirations, or aspiration to greatness, and we try to couch it in religious terms. It is almost as if we think that we are honoring God. We can honour God through little things that go unseen by others.
These thoughts and impressions have come from my journaling over this past year. As I have read through my journal, I have noticed the many times God used me in various ways. I do not need a title or an official ministry to be able to minister to others. God is the One who has ordained me and called me to serve Him. He will provide opportunities for me to serve. I can take encouragement from the fact that I am prepared and ready to serve. I am not using my gifts on an ongoing basis, but rather sporadically as the opportunities unfold. I know that God is in control. He is the One who made me; He is the One who gave me talents and abilities. It is at His discretion that He has given me certain spiritual gifts. God knows that I desire to be used.
During an evening of worship I had a picture in my mind of a giant hand at my side. I had thought that God had been preventing me from going somewhere or doing something, but through this picture I saw that God wanted to direct me where to go. His hand was protecting me and directing me. It was not as a hand in the stop position. I then realized that God did have a plan and I was walking in His plan. The desires I have deep inside are the fuel that gives me the desire or motivation to do what God has called me to do. I cannot make anything happen; I need to rely solely on God. Later, God impressed on my heart and spirit that He can and will direct if the “call” needs to come from someone rather than me volunteering on my own. My obedience to God’s call is either proactive by stepping out and volunteering to do something; or submissive by responding to requests to do something. I don’t need to be burdened by a desire to do something big for God; or be involved in some great purpose. God’s purpose for my life will be fulfilled and is being fulfilled.
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