Gratefulness or Self-Pity

"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. and be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." Colossians 3:15-17 (NIV)

I resented the fact that I needed to have surgery. I was regaining strength and health; I didn't want to be cut open and have to recover from surgery. I was struggling to have the right attitude toward surgery. I knew that I needed to be positive and to go into it with a positive attitude rather than a negative one.

As I was praying and thinking about my upcoming surgery, the thought came to me that I had a choice. I could wallow in self-pity or I could choose to be grateful. I have much to be grateful for:

I live in Canada, where the medical tests and procedures are readily available and paid for in Ontario by OHIP

When I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer, treatment began immediately

I have access to specialists and hospitals where I can receive treatment and have necessary surgery

All my medication is covered by my husband's health insurance plan

I have home care nurses who are paid for by CCAC

I have a wonderful family who is supportive of me in every way

I have been regaining strength and some of the weight that I had lost; I will be better equipped physically to undergo surgery

I have a caring church family, who pray and offer practical help as well

God has given me strength and His grace to cope; I know that He will be with me through the surgery and recovery

"Praise the Lord, I tell myself; with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name. Praise the Lord, I tell myself, and never forget the good things he does for me. He forgives all my sins and heals all my diseases." Psalm 103: 1-3 (NLT)