Saturday, 22 November 2008

Timelessness and Eternity

Whenever someone dies it draws attention to the fragility of life. One minute they are alive and the next minute they are dead. It sounds so final. It is final in this life that we see with our natural eyes. Those who know and love the Lord Jesus and who have received Him as their Lord and Saviour are now with Him in glory. To the uninitiated in the Christian faith this sounds rather "airy-fairy" or "pie-in-the-sky". Yet, the afterlife is more real than this present life. I don't think that the afterlife is something that starts once we die. Rather, I think that we leave finite time and enter eternity or unending time.

Eternity existed before God created the world and time. God always was; always is; always will be. God revealed Himself to Moses as "I AM" (Genesis 3:14). God is in a present state of being in our past; our present; our future. Jesus told the Pharisees "Before Abraham was... I am" (John 8:58).

I can have confidence and trust in God's care for me because God has already seen the future. He is already there, just like He has been in the past; He is still there too. I have a sense that eternity is all around us and that our solar system and beyond are all contained in "time", yet timelessness exists around it. Also God sometimes "opens a window" and allows some of the timelessness to invade our world. An example is at the transfiguration of Jesus when Moses and Elijah appear. (Mark 9:2-8).

Ecclesiastes 3:11 states "He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end." (NIV). As finite beings we would probably die if we were given any more timelessness (eternity) in our human bodies. That is why we need to be transformed and given spiritual bodies. God is Spirit; God is timeless. When we are changed we will be like Him and we will be timeless as well.

Friday, 21 November 2008

Winter is coming

It was quite traumatic being in hospital again and having an NG tube. It is a horrible experience when it is first inserted; and I later had to have it re-inserted because it was not properly situated the first time. It was also unsettling to be exposed to onlookers, sitting in a wheelchair with the NG tube still in place, while awaiting my daily x-ray. To top it all off my hair was often disheveled, while the members of the public, who were awaiting other tests, were often perfectly coiffed.

I think that I had been overzealous in wanting to resume my regular activities when I should have taken the time to properly recover. I went to church the day after I was released from the hospital, but I was so weak I had to sit the whole time. It really was too soon for me to go, but I wanted to be encouraged through the teaching of God's Word and worshipping with others. I also went to the women's Bible study on the Thursday morning as it was the final day of studying "Walking By Faith".

I know that my body was weakened through all that I had experienced in not eating for several days while in hospital. I developed a head cold the next weekend and it lasted for over a week. My energy level is low and I long for it to be restored. I feel as if I have suffered a setback and I am now back to where I was several months ago after my chemo treatments had finished. Yesterday I had a followup appointment with my family doctor. She encouraged me to rest and "take it easy" because I "have been through a lot". I am again reminded that my life is paralleling the natural seasons. Winter is encroaching and soon will be here.

Tuesday, 4 November 2008

A Recent Hospital Stay

A week ago Saturday, while at a women's retreat, I developed extreme abdominal gas pains and vomiting. My husband picked me up and drove me to Southlake hospital in Newmarket. I was admitted to hospital and diagnosed with a "kink" in my bowel. The doctors said that it was probably a result of my previous surgery and not uncommon.

I had a CT scan and then daily abdominal x-rays to monitor the situation. I did not want to have further surgery. I had an NG tube and I was put on "bowel rest"; I only had NaCl IV and later potassium was added. I was not even allowed to drink any water.

Many people were praying for me. I had the NG tube for four days, but on the fifth day I was allowed a liquid diet. On Friday evening I was allowed to have a soft diet. I was informed by the doctor that the bowel was now normal and there was no longer a "kink". For the past three days the x-rays had shown a change in the bowel.

I was discharged from the hospital on Saturday afternoon after a week long stay. I am now on a low-residue diet for four to six weeks.

Monday, 3 November 2008

Hair, There, and Everywhere

I never thought I would see the day when I would say that I don't like my hair. Well, I probably should qualify that statement by saying that I like my hair, I just don't like how it looks at the moment.

When I was losing my hair due to chemotherapy I could hardly wait for my hair to grow again! It was a novelty when it started to grow in curly. It looked cute and fashionable when it was shorter, but now that it is a couple of inches long I think that it looks old-fashioned! I think that I look like I am from the 1950's or 1960's!

It is now possible for me to awaken with bed-head and also to have bad hair days! Sometimes my hair seems to be going in every direction! I know that this is something that I should be grateful to experience, and I am, but... There is still the fact that there are days when my hair is not as I would like it to be.

I know that my hair is continuing to grow and I am not sure how I will finally have my hair styled. I do like the ease of care with a shorter hairstyle, but I am not sure how short I want to keep it. I am thinking that I would like to grow it a bit more and then maintain that length for a while. It will be interesting to see if my hair continues to have a curl after it has been cut.
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